Rating: R
Runtime: 1 hour, 35 minutes
Director: Elizabeth Banks
Quick Impressions:
So I had a big panic attack while I was watching Cocaine Bear, which I hesitated to mention, but then decided, “You know, that’s probably the best way to watch Cocaine Bear.”
I’ll bet Elizabeth Banks would be thrilled! I thought I was going to have a heart attack. My chest was so tight. I accidentally threw my popcorn on the floor. My husband had to tell me, “My arm isn’t detachable.” My back is so sore now. I haven’t had this much musculoskeletal pain after a movie since Uncut Gems. (That is a tense watch.)
Now, to be fair (and probably to disappoint some people) I did not have the panic attack because of the movie. But when you’re having a panic attack anyway, a cocaine-crazed bear lunging at the camera, ripping the cast limb from limb does not help you calm down.
I’ve been wanting to see this movie for months because a friend and former student mentioned it on Facebook (making me aware of it), and she has an excellent sense of humor, so I figured it would probably be great.
I mean, how could it not be? I like Elizabeth Banks. And how could you not want to see a movie called Cocaine Bear—especially when it’s about just that, a bear on cocaine going on a rampage, and it’s a true story? What could be better? We happily went to Snakes on a Plane for very similar reasons.
I’ll admit, I got a little worried when I started reading headlines about Elizabeth Banks saying what a risk this was and how it could destroy her career. Immediately, I fretted, “Oh no! Is it that boring?” (Doesn’t that seem like preemptive damage control because the movie’s totally boring?) But the movie is quite entertaining, better than I expected.
I can’t remember the ending very well, though. At least, I didn’t die!
The Good:
I got nervous early on because we get gore and legitimate threat pretty fast. I remember watching, worrying in dismay, “Is this going to be like Grindhouse?” But the focus is more on the humor.
Cocaine Bear is funnier than I expected. But its humor is a bit…quirky. That’s not exactly the right word. Off-kilter, maybe? At a certain point, I remember thinking, “This humor reminds me of Drowning Mona.” (In college, my friend group loved that movie, but we didn’t know anyone else who did. I haven’t thought of it in a long time. One of my friends particularly liked it, and she also loved the SNL sketch “Dog Show” more than anyone else I’ve ever known. We loved watching her watch it because she would laugh so hard.) More recently, The Dead Don’t Die was kind of like this, too, where you’re wanting to laugh but just kind of confused. (“Is this funny?”)
At moments, though, Cocaine Bear is genuinely, undeniably very funny.
It helps a lot that the characters are really likeable. At least, I liked them. Cocaine Bear features several sets of central characters, and my favorites were the drug lord (Ray Liotta in his final movie role) and his two employees (O’Shea Jackson Jr. and Alden Ehrenreich, who is also the character’s son). As I watched Liotta, I thought, “What a strange final entry on your filmography!” (But then I was thinking, “Is it stranger than Hannibal though? And what about Bee Movie?”) Liotta doesn’t have a huge part, but he’s a key character and gets some really nice moments. The character’s early exasperation with his son and frustration about the child-care situation genuinely amused me. The film is dedicated to Liotta, and it’s a stronger ending to his career than you might expect from the title Cocaine Bear.
I love Alden Ehrenreich in this. Watching his character was almost metadramatic or surreal or something because it was like someone had dropped me, at that moment, into the movie. I was supposed to be watching Cocaine Bear. He was supposed to be living it. And yet we were both extremely distracted by our own distress. And when I become inordinately distressed, one of my defense mechanisms is finding myself ridiculous, so it was easy to laugh at and with him (while simultaneously empathizing with his distress). For me, his performance was the highlight of the film.
I will admit, I like O’Shea Jackson Jr. just because he’s Ice Cube’s son. The first time I saw him, I thought, “That guy looks just like Ice Cube! He could be his son!” And then in the end credits, I gasped, “It is his son!” So now, every time I see him, I’m weirdly pleased. But I quickly got invested in his character, too.
Also good are Isiah Whitlock Jr. as a police detective (with a dog) and Margo Martindale as Ranger Liz whose budding romance takes a jarring turn.
Young Christian Convery is a bit of a scene stealer as Henry. Not until I got home did I realize that his frequent scene partner Dee Dee is played by Brooklynn Prince who played Moonee in The Florida Project (a film I was just thinking of the other day when an early scene of To Leslie brought it to mind).
The bear itself also looks great. I don’t know if it’s in any way real, but that I didn’t even consider it might not be while watching is a compliment to the film.
Best Scene:
My favorite scene is the unexpected gazebo stand-off that gets broken up by the bear. I was so confused, though, by the alleged placement of the bear’s vagina. I expected it to be in a different place. (But this is probably why I never did well on those spatial relationship activities in G/T classes.)
Best Action Sequence:
I like the tense moment when Margo Martindale is struggling to speak.
Best Scene Visually:
The montage of Early 80s anti-drug commercials is pretty captivating.
The Negatives:
I mean, it’s a bear on cocaine. I suppose we also get encouraging messages about friendship, family, and not taking abuse. But mostly, it’s a bear on cocaine. A cocaine bear.
I was mad at myself for never fully getting invested in the storyline featuring Kerri Russell and the kids. (I like Russell. I’m always happy to watch her. It was probably me. To be fair, I was having a panic attack.) I wasn’t crazy about the teen gang prowling the National Park, either. Elements of that storyline fell flat for me. It’s a bit disappointing, too, to discover that although a bear truly did eat a bunch of cocaine that fell out of an airplane, everything about the crazed, bloody rampage is entirely made up.
I also found it nearly too alarming to endure when the kids first discovered the cocaine. They were so innocent and so eager that I was sure they were going to end up accidentally killing themselves before the bear even showed up. (That scene is really funny, though.)
Cocaine Bear is a lot of fun. I should probably watch it again sometime when I’m not having a panic attack. I sort of felt like I myself had taken a bunch of cocaine just as the movie was starting. I’m not sure if that made the experience better or worse.
Overall:
Cocaine Bear has a lot of good qualities. It’s got a bear. Cocaine. Plenty of funny jokes (although some that don’t quite work). And a talented ensemble cast, including Ray Liotta in his final film role. I hope I get to watch it again sometime when I’m in a calmer frame of mind.