Tier Four (B-)
Last summer, I noticed a more pronounced separation between excellent films, good movies, mediocre ones, and Battleship (which I experienced as an attack rather than entertainment, though it was my son’s clear favorite). This year brought markedly fewer excellent films, but far more good ones.
Even though this is the second to lowest tier of my rankings, I still enjoyed all of these movies, and I would be happy to watch any of them again. Basically these films are ranked this low for one of two reasons. 1.) The movie shows flashes of brilliance but stumbles noticeably in overall execution (The Lone Ranger and Man of Steel) or 2.) The movie is great for what it is but has very modest scope (Pacific Rim, This is the End, The Kings of Summer).
20.) The Kings of Summer (B-/C+)
What I Liked:
Somebody should start calling 2013, The Year We Came of Age. Seriously how many coming of age movies have hit theaters so far this year? Even setting aside the blatant stuff like this film, Mud, and The Way, Way Back, we still get tons of variation on the theme, including offbeat girls come of age (The Croods, Stoker), aliens become super men by successfully blending their otherness and their humanity (Man of Steel and perhaps Star Trek), boys come of age in another age (Jack the Giant Slayer, After Earth, Epic, Lee Daniels’ The Butler), no-longer-boys come of age a bit late (Oz the Great and Powerful, Monsters University), a boy fails to come of age because of alien abduction (Dark Skies), man-boys begin to act their age in the nick of time to make the rapture (This is the End). I mean, good grief! These are just the most obvious examples. And it’s only just now September!
Mind you, I’m not complaining. I love a good coming of age story, probably more than the next person (because I often write young adult), and I really enjoyed The Kings of Summer. It’s extremely (though not evenly) funny with fantastic comedic performances from the adult supporting cast, including Nick Offerman, Megan Mullally, Marc Evan Jackson, Mary Lynn Rajskub and Thomas Middleditch. Instead of acting like real people, the adults in this film behave more in the way their slightly embarrassed teens might imagine them. They’re wacky, intrusive, out-of-touch with reality, zany, mercurial, reactionary, and always, always way over-the-top.
The young cast is also fantastic. I particularly like Nick Robinson (better with the drama as lead character Joe) and Gabriel Basso (more of a maestro with comedy as Joe’s best friend Patrick). Allison Brie also turns up in yet another scene stealing supporting role (what she does best) as Joe’s older sister, the only non-crazy adult in the film.
The movie is often (though not regularly) laugh out loud funny, featuring a number of off kilter zingers that would make a killer T-shirt or bumper sticker. At times it is also quite dramatic (even depressing). Only Nick Offerman seems able to balance the comedy and drama perfectly, but overall the movie successfully gives us a peek into the agonies and triumphs of becoming a man.
As someone who has never become a man, I really don’t understand the emerging male obsession with roughing it in the woods, but I do like looking at the trees. The cinematography in this film is heart-stoppingly brilliant, probably the movie’s best standalone component. The soundtrack (while clearly very impressed with itself) is also pretty cool.
What I Didn’t Like:
The Kings of Summer seems like a quirky, charming and sincere early film made by people who will go on to create more polished, consistent work in the future. Both screenwriter Chris Galletta and director Jordan Vogt-Roberts are relatively new to making feature length films, and it shows. The film’s quirkiness is a huge strength, but there comes a point when we start wondering if this movie loves being outside the box so much because it has no idea how to get inside the box.
The tonal shifts are numerous, dramatic, awkward, unpredictable, total, and totally jarring. Granted this tonal turbulence may be an attempt at verisimilitude since we are seeing the world from the point of view of an adolescent, and teens are notorious for rapid, intense mood swings. But whether intentional or not, the continual shifts in tone make the film impossible to get lost in, and at some moments hard to watch. Is this a comedy, a drama, a tragedy, a farce? How are we supposed to react to what’s coming at us on screen? The movie doesn’t always let us know how we’re supposed to engage with a particular scene quickly enough to allow us to react properly.
Even if we ignore the almost constant tonal veering, it’s impossible to overlook the fact that the film begins as a zany comedy and concludes as a pretentious drama. When it’s a comedy, The Kings of Summer is not consistently funny. Most of the scenes appear heavily improvised, and some of the jokes work much better than others. Not every joke lands, and maybe as many as one in every four fails completely. For every laugh out loud moment, there’s a painfully silent counterpart when cast members refuse to let a failed joke die in a timely manner. Plus when the movie is at its funniest, it’s also at its most unrealistic. The boys are often too witty, all the parents are completely crazy, and Biaggio takes being larger-than-life to new and terrifying heights.
Biaggio could be an iconic character. (Clearly he’s meant to be.) Unfortunately, his eccentricity is pushed so far that he ultimately becomes too kooky for belief. I am well aware that in high school (as in life) really weird kids are lurking around every corner, desperate to do anything and everything to get people’s attention and make friends. But Biaggio needs more of a tether to reality. He would be funnier if he seemed a bit more real. As it is, he seems like a character written for shock value and laughs who always says or does the most outrageous and unlikely thing in any given situation. He’s like a human episode of I Love Lucy with bug eyes and an improbable resting face. He never opens a door if he could jump out a window, bulldoze through the wall, or torch the place entirely. Really he’s just too much, though young Moises Arias does a fantastic job playing him.
And of course, in the end, this movie is just about the misadventures of three boys who try to grow into men by spending a summer in a cabin in the woods that they built themselves. Like everyone’s adolescence, it’s all much more important to the person experiencing it than to all the rest of us. We feel for Joe. We also like him. And we are interested in his story. But it can’t possibly mean to the audience what it means to him. It can’t, and it doesn’t.
19.) This is the End (B-/C+)
What I Liked:
Though even I think it seems unlikely, Superbad is one of my favorite movies. (It is infinitely rewatachable, and before my four-year-old came along, I used to watch it at home all the time.) So even though Judd Apatowish comedies aren’t always my thing (really depends on who’s writing them), I decided to give this one a try, and I loved practically every minute of it.
Yes it’s crude, of course it’s puerile, but still, this movie is pretty darn hilarious. Even more than I love coming of age stories, I’m a sucker for metadrama, and the premise of a party at James Franco’s house ending in The Apocalypse had me hooked. Yes (again) it’s a blatant gimmick to have Franco, Seth Rogan, Jay Baruchel, Danny McBride, Craig Robinson, and Jonah Hill all playing “themselves,” but it still works. The movie is a lot of fun, and it’s really helped along by some of the most fabulously hilarious cameos ever seen on screen.
Michael Cera. Michael Cera. Michael Cera. (If you’ve seen the movie, repeating his name is enough on its own. You know what I mean. You probably agree.) This is probably the smartest career move I’ve seen by Cera since…ever. His outrageous long cameo is the most unexpected and delightful element of This is the End. Seriously, they should make a sequel called What Will Michael Cera Do Next? More often than not, shock humor fails to win my heart. (When it fails, it’s crude, obnoxious, and even offensive without being particularly funny.) But Cera’s increasingly shocking scenes are not only funny, they are so awesome that I felt wrenching disappointment when they came to an abrupt and dramatic end. I would have kept watching him for ninety minutes. Seriously.
Channing Tatum also makes a memorable cameo, an otherwise disappointing moment that is entirely redeemed and made hilarious by his presence. I particularly liked Paul Rudd’s rather understated cameo, too, and there are like a million more.
Though I don’t always find him as amazing as he does, James Franco and I do share one common passion—making fun of James Franco. (We probably share more passions than that, to be honest, but that’s the one that’s relevant to this review.) Franco may not be perfect, but he’s definitely a good sport, and he’s extremely funny here, particularly in his sinister dynamic with Danny McBride (an actor whose humor doesn’t always work for me, but definitely won my heart in This is the End). Craig Robinson is also memorable for creating a “Craig Robinson” who is funny yet still sympathetic. He’s the only one of the principals who manages to get big laughs yet still seem like a real person. And Jonah Hill isn’t afraid to take big risks. Both his scene with the gun and his Rosemary’s Baby moment managed to get my attention (eventually in a positive way).
And even though the movie becomes less cohesive as it goes, the ending is so unexpected and perfect that it more than makes up for any weak scenes preceding it. Plus how many movies give you a peek at an axe-wielding Emma Watson?
What I Didn’t Like:
Okay I was lying when I said that I loved “every minute” of it. There’s a long section in the final act that drags more than a bit as the movie gets progressively weirder than it is funny. The better-than-I-could-have-anticipated ending does much to bury these less than perfect scenes for me, but others may not be as forgiving. (I’m an easy grader. I know it. When I’m impressed overall, I overlook a lot.)
This movie can’t possibly be as rewatchable as Superbad. (At least, it won’t be as often rewatched by me because I spend my days hanging out with a four-year-old now, and while she watches a lot, she won’t be watching This is the End anytime soon.) Honestly, I can’t imagine that This is the End would be quite as good a second time (though I’d be happy to watch it again, given the opportunity).
Like The Kings of Summer, This is the End has a somewhat limited premise and modest aspirations. It’s not pretending to be anything important. It’s just a goofy comedy that tries (and surprisingly often succeeds) to be shocking, outrageous, and hilarious.
Also, though the jokes are great, This is the End is by far the ugliest movie I’ve seen all year. It makes absolutely no effort to look impressive, use convincing special effects, or give us any sense whatsoever of visual coherency. And that’s fine. I’m sure nobody’s going to this looking for beauty, but the fact remains that This is the End is one ugly movie.
Emma Watson running wild with an axe seems like a huge loose end as well unless she’s getting her own spin-off (which given how much fun she had making this film, I highly doubt).
18.) Pacific Rim (B-)
What I Liked:
“Ba-da-da-DaDAAAAAA! Ba-da-da-DaDAAAAAA!” Pacific Rim has the most memorable (though perhaps just a trifle overused) theme song of the summer. My husband thought it was really catchy.
When I think back on this movie, I hear that song and get a flash of Rinko Kikuchi with cool blue hair and a look of determination on her face, strapped up inside a mecha killing machine, ready to take down Godzilla.
Well, I mean, the Godzilla is not actually featured in this movie per se (that I’m aware of), but Pacific Rim is all about the ongoing war between mecha/human warriors (Jaegers) and Kaiju invaders from beneath the sea (and out of this world). If you grew up watching black and white Kaiju classics on the edge of your seat, then this big budget treatment is sure to make your heart explode (with joy).
Two things make this movie fantastic summer entertainment. The first is its unabashed sense of fun. Pacific Rim knows it’s a summer diversion. It isn’t pretending to be this year’s Best Picture front runner or even a gritty, hard-hitting drama. No, this is pure popcorn entertainment. At moments, its use of wacky scientists (Charlie Day and Burn Gorman) and brilliant, pitch-perfect appearance by Ron Perlman reminded me fondly of the happy-go-lucky tone of the summer blockbusters of my youth (i.e. the mid-1990s when I was in high school).
The other great strength of Pacific Rim is the way it showcases female victim-turned-savior Mako Mori, an unusually strong and exciting female character, the kind who doesn’t usually show up in American action movies. It’s cool to see past Oscar nominee Rinko Kikuchi in something more fun. But the one who really steals the show is child actress Mana Ashida who plays young Mako in what is definitely the best scene in Pacific Rim and a candidate for the strongest and most elegant movie scene of the summer.
The rest of the cast is also pretty great. I love Idris Elba in everything, Max Martini is solid, and Charlie Hunnam surprised me by being a better actor playing a more likable male lead than I expected. (I don’t know whether to be happy or sad that he was recently cast as Christian Grey. Is being cast as one of the leads in Fifty Shades of Grey something that makes your mother proud or dismayed?)
What I Didn’t Like:
“Ba-da-da-DaDAAAAAA! Ba-da-da-DaDAAAAAA!”
Seriously I could fill up this entire section with “Ba-da-da-DaDAAAAA”s. It’s not that Pacific Rim has a bad theme, just that it’s so overplayed and so lacking in variety. That driving fanfare shows up so often that by the end, every new iteration had me shaking my head and suppressing a giggle. Seriously, if there were a drinking game, the entire audience would pass out halfway through the movie.
“Ba-da-da-DaDAAAAA! Ba-da-da-Da-DAAAAAA!”
But the only real reason Pacific Rim doesn’t rank higher on my list is that I saw seventeen other movies I liked better this summer. It’s great for what it is, but just like The Kings of Summer and This is the End, Pacific Rim is a niche film with limited ambitions. If you live for kaiju movies, then boy are you going to love this one! And if you’re just looking for a pleasant way to kill a couple of hours, you should find Pacific Rim perfectly diverting if not life altering.
“Ba-da-da-DaDAAAAA! Ba-da-da-DaDAAAAAAAA!”
17.) Man of Steel (B-)
What I Liked:
With better editing, Man of Steel would soar far closer to the top of my list. The pacing is way off, and in the slow spots, the film drags on and on, but buried somewhere in all that seemingly endless footage lies what’s undoubtedly the best Superman movie yet.
Beginning on Krypton was a stroke of genius. Superman’s never been my favorite hero. (He was super popular, of course, when I was my daughter’s age, but I preferred Wonder Woman, the Green Lantern, and the Incredible Hulk). (Of course, I was a four-year-old girl whose favorite color was green, so if Superman had worn a cape made of Kryptonite or…been an Amazon princess, he would have had a better chance with me for sure.) My point is, though, that Superman’s never been my favorite because he seems like such a boring guy. The way he’s usually presented in cinema and on TV, you kind of forget he’s an alien. Staring off on another world in a distant galaxy really ups the excitement level. And not only does Krypton look exciting and exotic, but Russell Crowe and Michael Shannon are there having a physical and ideological battle so engrossing that it could have held my attention for the film’s total runtime.
Now I’ve never been a huge fan of Russell Crowe. (I don’t hate him exactly. I just don’t get why he smiles so infrequently, attacks strangers so often, and makes so many vocal women go weak in the knees.) But the man can act and as Jor-El makes the most of the best part he’s had since 3:10 to Yuma. (Yes, I’m serious.) Think how the earlier Superman movies wasted Marlon Brando! Who would have thought that Jor-El would get a better part than Superman?
And remember twenty-two-year-old Kate Bosworth as a Pulitzer-winning career newswoman with an eight-year-old son? Yeah, she’s not in this one, another huge point in the movie’s favor. No offense to Bosworth. She was just horribly miscast. Amy Adams doesn’t have to do anything but show up to make a more convincing Lois Lane, and Adams does a lot more than that. She’s great in the role and has a surprising amount to do. Who would have thought Lois Lane would get a better part than Superman?
The film has an inspired supporting cast, too. Who better to play Pa Kent than Kevin Costner? Diane Lane is great as Martha, and we also see compelling (though brief) performances from Laurence Fishburne, Antje Traue, Harry Lennix, and Christopher Meloni.
What I Didn’t Like:
Remember when I said that Jor-El and Lois Lane both get a better part than Superman? It’s wonderful to see those characters so well developed, involved, and compelling, but why on Earth doesn’t the movie then up its game and give an even more awesome and pivotal action sequence to Superman? Henry Cavill looks the part and is good in the role, but he spends far too much of the movie trying to find himself. We already know who he is. He’s Superman! For the love of Krypton, give him something awesome to do!
Like I said before, the biggest problem with Man of Steel is its pacing. We don’t spend enough time on the stuff that counts, and we linger over moments that just don’t require such detailed dramatization. This is only one flaw, but it’s the kind of flaw that casts a long shadow—pretty much over the entire runtime (which is almost two and a half hours, by the way).
There is no point in having so many flashbacks if you’re flashing back from a present moment in which absolutely nothing of any significance is happening. Just start at the beginning of all those flashbacks, tell the story in order, and skip over the boring part entirely.
Also though as I said the film has an inspired cast, it largely squanders its wealth of talented supporting actors.
Now there’s enough here to make me excited that the franchise is moving forward (finally). I’m sure I’m in the minority when I say that I’m cautiously optimistic about Ben Affleck as Batman. Too bad Ben Affleck won’t be directing the film, though. I’m sure Zack Snyder has tons of fans, and I was hoping Man of Steel might make me a fan, too, but it didn’t.
16.) The Lone Ranger (B-)
What I Liked:
Detractors of The Lone Ranger may claim that the whole thing is one big train wreck, but I know better. The Lone Ranger is at least three big train wrecks, plus I don’t know how many small train wrecks , near misses, and runaway trains. Railroad aficionados have been waiting their whole lives for a summer blockbuster like this to come along! Heigh-ho, Silver! Away!
I realize ranking The Lone Ranger this high seems crazy, but frankly, I am a little crazy and I know I’m not alone because somebody greenlit this version of The Lone Ranger, expecting it to be a huge box office smash.
In my review, I mocked the final scene of Tonto walking off alone into the desert, calling it “memorably odd.” But guess what? It’s stuck in my head. Even though the scene seems out of place in a mainstream summer release, that final image is still poignant, and I won’t be forgetting it any time soon.
Plus the movie does have its crowd pleasing moments. The last big action scene set to the rousing William Tell Overture is brilliantly choreographed, viscerally exciting, probably expensive, and well worth the price of admission (if you can stay awake long enough to see it).
The first forty-five minutes do drag (and forty-five is a big number, I’ll concede), but once Johnny Depp and Armie Hammer finally develop a rapport, there’s lots of fun to be had. William Fitchner and James Badge Dale are great in supporting roles, and who wouldn’t want to play an Old West madam whose ivory leg doubles as a small cannon? Helena Bonham Carter’s clearly having lots of fun here, and adults in the audience will also have a lot of fun if they catch her pretty subtle explanation of how Tom Wilkinson’s character is no longer like other men. Crucial bits of information like that bring a new level of hilarity to his intense obsession with the railroad (and explain his fixation on Rebecca and Danny).
Johnny Depp has (compared to me, at least) all the money in the world. I believe him when he says that he loves the character of Tonto and has always wanted to play him and make a new generation of children see Tonto as a hero in his own right.
The Lone Ranger is far from perfect, but it’s a film that’s got a lot to say, and the cinematography (featuring some stunning shots of the southwest) is wondrous to behold.
What I Didn’t Like:
When I’ve already said that the first forty-five minutes of the movie aren’t great, do I really need to say more? I will, though. I’ll say more.
My daughter went into this movie thinking “the guy with the crow on his head” was the Lone Ranger. She complained, “I wanted it to be about The Lone Ranger, but it kept showing that dumb guy.” I’m all for Armie Hammer, but Johnny Depp is the star of this film. His face is being used to sell The Lone Ranger, and he gets the best part in The Lone Ranger, and I’m willing to bet my kid is not the only one who goes in thinking he is the Lone Ranger. I do remember the old TV series in reruns, but I have an unusually good memory, and I’m thirty-four. I have to think most people younger than I am really know nothing at all about the Lone Ranger (unless maybe they’re Green Hornet fans or something). It’s awesome that they wanted to make Tonto a co-protagonist, but sometimes he seems like the only protagonist.
The frame story flat out doesn’t work. In the abstract, it’s a cool idea, but it doesn’t fit the movie, and it creates needless confusion. The plot is pulled in too many different directions. The pacing is way off. The tonal shifts are bewildering. We get whimsy one moment, gruesome revenge the next, then gritty drama followed by action, comedy, and a number of scenes more often found in art house cinema than on thousands of summer screens.
And then there’s the matter of the runaway trains. Once they start coming at us, they just don’t stop. If two and a half hours of runaway trains is your idea of a good time, then you should have gone to this movie because almost nobody else did, and they used real trains! Those don’t come cheap! Have a heart!