This is the tier I can’t stop rearranging. It’s made up of films that either disappointed or surprised me. Two of them could not possibly meet the high hopes I’d developed over months of near-rabid expectation. One of them impressed me despite my complete non-investment in it, and the other turned out to be a marvelous film that had never even been on my radar. I’ll start with that one I guess. (Better to go ahead and begin the analysis before I shuffle them around yet again!)
15.) The Conjuring (B/B+)
What I Liked:
I almost never go to horror movies. I went to this one because I was intrigued—by the brand new theater where it was showing. Now torture porn or a D-list cast would have lost me, but how could I turn up my nose at Patrick Wilson, Vera Farmiga, and Lily Taylor? That’s not who signs on if the movie is cheap, slapdash gore. The cast was solid, the previews looked striking, the milkshakes were alcoholic, and the popcorn was bottomless. So I conquered my fears, took a chance, and was rewarded with a film of surprising quality.
There’s so much to love about The Conjuring. Here’s a short list of what wowed me:
1) Hide-and-clap in a haunted house (now featuring five bickering sisters from the 1970s)!
2) That wonderful, beautiful, captivating, talented young Joey King (the China girl from Oz, the beautiful child from The Dark Knight Rises) and her onscreen sisters
3) Vera Farmiga (whose name reminds me of veal parmesan, delicious yet evil) imbuing the somewhat paradoxical devout Christian medium Lorraine Warren with the elegant strength of a wilting flower making nastic movements toward a spectral sun
4) Patrick Wilson just being cool
5) The haunted Lily Taylor at her most anemic
6) Well staged, old-school, genuine scares
7) Perfect pacing, spooktacular cinematography, lack of stupid puns like that in the movie
8) A sprinkling of humor that isn’t insulting
9) Ron Livingston making some guy named Roger seem more interesting than the only non-priest authorized by the Roman Catholic church to perform exorcisms
10) The kind of scary, slow building horror that fans of the genre deserve from every scary movie
Basically, I’m not a horror fan, and you don’t have to be to enjoy this fairly excellent summer hit that transcends genre.
What I Didn’t Like:
Maybe because I experience horrifying sleep paralysis regularly, I feel too eager to debunk the Satanic premise, but I don’t believe The Conjuring is really a “true story.”
For one thing, I’ve now read up on the actual family, and (as always) the movie makes extremely liberal changes to the source material, eager to give audiences the most gripping dramatization of events conceivable.
Secondly, I saw only one other horror movie this year (Dark Skies), and the stuff it used to disturb the audience was exactly the same. So evil spirits can’t be the only conclusion because they behave exactly the same way as aliens. And you know what else causes you to observe the same types of disturbing phenomena? Mental illness.
Some of these hauntings in general give me pause. The evil spirits always seem to come with a rancid smell of death. I’d just like to point out that sleep paralysis can be aggravated by sinus or chest congestion that restricts your airway when you’re lying on your back. So if you start freaking out, sensing an evil presence, seeing your nightmares projected before your eyes as you’re unable to move, before you call an exorcist, please consider that the “rancid smell” may be your own sinus drainage congesting your airway and causing your mind to wake suddenly while your body is still self-paralyzed and dreaming.
I realize, of course, that someone could argue, “Yes, but this medical approach simply makes note of what is happening to the body. Such measurable data could be caused by any number of spiritual or alien disturbances, and maybe ‘hallucinating’ subjects can access reality through senses the rest of us don’t have.” That’s all well and good, but unless the filmmakers have some secret access to the beyond, they’re probably relying on a lot of stock horror tropes to sell their movie, so it’s patronizing and misleading (and SCARY!!!!) to call it a true story. That’s like calling Sleepless and Seattle a true story because radio call-in shows do exist, Seattle is a place, and two people fell in love once.
I mean, yes, Lorraine Warren was involved in the making of the film, and everybody knows she’s for real (except the nine-hundred million people who insist she’s the biggest fake ever).
Still who in their right mind goes to the movies expecting an actually true story? I guess I can let that slide, but I do have some other small complaints.
Does anyone disagree that the really scary part at the end of the movie is not only actually the least scary part but also at moments unintentionally funny? Also why do we get no resolution about the terrible thing that once happened to Lorraine? The movie just lets that drop. And why is it again that the Warrens think it’s okay to leave their young daughter home alone in a museum dedicated to weird Satanic objects that have actively tried to possess and kill people in the past?
Despite these small flaws, The Conjuring is pretty solid classic horror. It ranks this low only because I’m not a horror fan and liked less scary stuff a little better.
14.) Monsters University (B/B+)
What I Liked:
This film is like the younger sibling of a well-rounded, likable genius. Based on its own merits, it probably deserves a higher grade, but you think of the brilliance of Monsters, Inc., and the second installment just doesn’t live up to the legacy. Sorry MU, you’re the B student of the family.
I do love the theme song, though. Getting used to the college band sound of the score took me a while, but now the main theme keeps marching through my head, bringing a smile to my face every time.
In some ways, MU is great. Mike and Sully have always been likable, well-voiced characters, but this time around, Billy Crystal steals the show with a riveting (more dramatic than comedic) lead performance. The Oozma Kappa gang are pretty charming, too, though they take some getting used to, and Helen Mirren is fittingly menacing as the winged but unflappable Dean Hardscrabble.
As always with Pixar, the movie looks fantastic, and there’s a lot of thought put into the humor and character development. Another unusual plus is that the movie is rated G (a rarity these days) and completely appropriate for audiences of any age.
When it comes to amazing scenes, Monsters University saves the best for last. Why it doesn’t deliver this type of excellence any sooner remains a mystery to me, but I’ll take what I can get. What happens after Mike and Sully (finally) go through a door is amazing, exciting, explosive, and wonderful. If the whole movie had performed at the high level of this sequence, I would definitely have given it an A+.
What I Didn’t Like:
On the car ride home from the theater, we all discussed what we’d liked best, and my four-year-old announced confidently, “My favorite part was the one before where they had Boo.”
That’s the great thing about four-year-olds. They get straight to the heart of the matter. Of course, she was right. Monsters University is quirky and charming and clearly made with love, but by far its greatest strength is that it reminds us of Monsters, Inc. That’s a double-edged sword, though. Forget any hope of surpassing the original, Monsters University isn’t even playing in the same league. Monsters, Inc. is a masterpiece. Monsters University is the lesser adventures of characters who find their greatness elsewhere.
Despite Billy Crystal’s fantastic performance as Mike, young children may have a hard time identifying with college aged characters who are discovering that in adult life, childhood dreams don’t always come true. As an adult who dreams big, I personally found much of the movie intensely depressing. Watching Mike, last to learn he wasn’t cut out to be a scarer, I kept thinking, Am I just kidding myself? Am I striving for success that will never come because of my lack of talent? Now in the end, the film becomes rousing and inspiring. But I still think it’s easier for kids (and parents) to relate to a simple story (featuring an adorable toddler) about becoming a parent and learning that inspiring joy is more rewarding than instilling fear. How many preschoolers are in love with late 70s/early 80s college movies? How many of them even have a clear idea of what college is?
For most of its runtime, Monsters University is episodic, jumbled, uninspired, predictable, and a little bit slow. It’s not bad. Once we get used to the premise and tone, in fact, it becomes just shy of good. But great? No, MU is definitely no Monsters, Inc.
13.) The Wolverine (B+/B)
What I Liked:
I like Hugh Jackman as much as the next human (seriously, what’s not to love?), but I couldn’t care less about Wolverine. As comic book heroes go, he’s never been my favorite. I mean, just look at him. He’s not green, he’s certainly not Wonder Woman! Plus all he does is brood around being angsty, unkempt, and isolated. He’s like the teenage me but with bushier facial hair, “bub”bier diction, a stronger constitution, and, of course, a retractable set of adamantium claws. So even though my family found the first Wolverine spin-off a better film than its reviews suggested, I still didn’t expect a whole lot from this movie.
But as it turns out, The Wolverine has that rare quality so seldom seen in ubiquitously advertised, big budget summer blockbusters. It’s good.
Who could have foreseen that?
Probably the mysterious Yukio (played with captivating skill by Rila Fukushima). A fantastic character that my four-year-old daughter and I loved, Yukio is that strange creature all too rarely seen in a Hollywood movie. She’s a strong, fascinating female character who still gets a central part in the action even though the male protagonist is not hunting her for business or pleasure. Yukio is not Logan’s love interest, and she’s not the villain. She’s just a cool, exciting young woman with a sharp intellect, a captivating backstory of her own, cool powers, and a number of admirable qualities who gets to participate in the story, too. I really liked her, and so did my little girl.
The screenplay by Mark Bomback and Scott Frank is extremely well written. I mean, there are predictable elements, sure, and the ending is clunky, but we get such complex characters and deep symbolism, all so elegantly and artfully presented. This is one smart, character driven action movie that asks a lot of high minded questions but expects us to find the answers for ourselves.
I’m also a fan of Marco Beltrami’s score. Beltrami also scored James Mangold’s earlier directorial effort 3:10 to Yuma, and I think both films show how well the two work together.
What I Didn’t Like:
Famke Janssen is a lovely woman whom I’ve always liked as Jean Grey, but she doesn’t have a lot to work with here. All those intercalary scenes of Jean—the sort of liminal, dreamy, not-really-flashbacks—just don’t work. They interrupt the flow of the story, they’re pretty boring, and they make Jean seem gray and lifeless. I realize that she is lifeless (literally) (and there I’m using literally literally, not in its more progressive sense to mean figuratively), but even though I can understand why these scenes have value, they’re still a soul-sucking energy drain to watch.
In general, though The Wolverine gives us a lot to think about, it doesn’t always entertain us as much as it might. Hopefully the ending isn’t supposed to be a surprise to anyone but Logan and Mariko because you don’t have to have Yukio’s amazing gifts to see it coming from way back in the opening act.
Also, normally I don’t campaign for more graphic violence, but there’s at least one pivotal scene that feels cheated out of its potential power by a (in this case crippling) PG-13 rating. Maybe such a dark, gritty story about a dark, brooding character would have found surer footing if it took the plunge and accepted an R. Of course, then my four-year-old couldn’t have watched it, and it has edged out Wreck-It Ralph to become her third favorite film of all time.
12.) Star Trek Into Darkness (B+/B)
What I Liked:
Like Monsters University, this film may have fallen victim to my unrealistically high expectations. J.J. Abrams’s first Star Trek reboot was one of the very best movies of 2009, and ever since then I’ve been dying to see the sequel.
The alternate reality aspect of the first film struck me as so brilliant. What a perfect way to take characters we already know and love where no one has gone before! And the new cast is stellar.
They’re just as good this time around. If anything, Chris Pine seems a little better as Kirk struggles to mature. And Zachary Quinto gets to take the character of Spock in unforeseen and exciting directions, as well. Karl Urban continues to channel DeForest Kelly with great success. Simon Pegg still makes an amusing, engaging Scotty. Zoe Saldana is fabulous as ever as Uhura. Best of all, Scotty and Uhura like Sulu (John Cho) and Chekov (Anton Yelchin) actually get to participate in the character development and heroics. They aren’t just along for the ride, watching Kirk be the hero and Spock and Bones step up as his bickering best friends and closest colleagues.
Bruce Greenwood is back, too, in a meaningful role. And this voyage of the starship Enterprise is also packed with great new guest stars including Peter Weller and Alice Eve (of whom we’ll surely see more in the future—though in another sense we may have seen a little too much of her this time).
Best of all, of course, is Benedict Cumberbatch. Anyone who inspires groupies calling themselves “Cumberbitches” deserves the plum supporting role, and even though every rumor I’d heard about Cumberbatch’s mystery character turned out to be true, I still found his villainish turn electrifying to watch. I admit I was little surprised everybody caught onto the truth about him so quickly, but honestly, I would have been more disappointed to discover all the rumors were false.
Into Darkness is exactly what we hope to see when we go to a summer blockbuster. It looks good. It sounds good. It looks expensive but doesn’t waste its budget. The plot makes sense. The pacing is great. The action is intense yet easy to follow. The performances are so good that you watch this sequel already excited about the third film in the franchise when the characters will come back to delight us again. Even the score is stronger than average. Summer movie goers can buy a ticket for this film and relax, reassured that they haven’t chosen wrong and wasted their hard earned money.
What I Didn’t Like:
Going into the summer, Star Trek was without a doubt the film I was most excited to see. It was without competition, definitely, indisputably first on my list. And then I saw it, and it fell all the way to number twelve.
Part of me thinks I’m being unfair to the movie. Yes, I was a little disappointed, but such heightened expectations usually end in disappointment.
I’m happy that the rumors about Cumberbatch were true because an awesome actor deserves an iconic character (and vice versa). But if we’re on a completely different time-line, in an almost Fringe like alternate universe, then why does the end of the movie play out the way it does? Fans of an earlier Star Trek film think, What? That’s too similar! followed by Wait! That’s too soon! It’s all a little confusing. Is this a reboot or a remake or what?
With a little distance, I think the ending does work. It gives both Spock and Kirk an interesting new emotional trajectory. Like a “what-if” come to life, it’s pleasantly thought-and-conversation-provoking. But it wasn’t really what I expected from the film. Deep inside, the childlike movie fan in me wanted to see a little bit more that was new and unexpected.
Star Trek Into Darkness is still a very good summer movie with better than average production value and an incredible ensemble cast. It just wasn’t quite as phenomenal and innovative as I’d hoped.